The door clicks shut, but the hum of the office doesn’t quite fill the space your manager’s voice just occupied. It’s still there, an echo in the weirdly conditioned air. “You’re doing great work on the reports. Just… be more strategic. And everyone loves your energy in meetings!” You’re left with a kind of conversational vertigo, a feeling of being praised and… what? Nudged? Warned? It’s like being told you’re a fantastic driver right after you’ve scraped a hubcap, but the person telling you only points vaguely at the car and says, “Just be more… parallel.”
The Stale Feedback Sandwich
This is the aftermath of the feedback sandwich. The cheap, processed bread of praise, the thin, questionable meat of criticism, and another stale slice of praise to choke it all down. For years, I thought this was the enlightened way. The gentle way. The way to deliver a difficult message without hurting someone’s feelings. I’ve delivered hundreds of them myself. I’ve coached new managers, drawing diagrams on whiteboards, explaining the sacred praise-critique-praise structure. I was wrong. It’s not enlightened. It’s not even kind.
CRITICISM
Praise, Criticism (blunted), Praise – a recipe for confusion.
It’s a tool for cowards.
“
It’s a technique designed not for the growth of the recipient, but for the comfort of the giver. It’s a conversational anesthetic that allows the manager to avoid the discomfort









